what do you say about you?

This year, I've tried to be brutally honest with myself about everything. Whether it's how I perceive myself, or other people, or situations that are far beyond my control, I try to not be as idealistic as I have been in the past. I attempt to have a mindset of contentment based on what God has done and what He will continue to do and what He says about me, rather than what I wear to class or my Saturday night plans or what sorority letters I wear say about me.

Not to inundate you with yet another camp reference, but, I spent my entire summer with young girls who didn't give two flips about what I wore, or who I was friends with, or where I went to college. All they cared about was how willing I was to show love to them on a daily basis, how well I served them, and where the source of my love was from. It brought me back to the core of who God says I am. And it also brought me to the core of what I'd been saying about myself for months--possibly years--on end.

Recently, one of the truths that has been ringing through my head is that what we love the most is what we choose to be most passionate about. It's true. In a season of my life where I found myself finding my identity in my ability to upkeep a solid Instagram feed, I loved that the most. I remember going out to do things with my friends a lot, sometimes all under the guise of my desire to get a good Instagram photo so that I could post it, and along with it, display my ability to maintain an abounding social life. There was a season of my life where I was paralyzed by my deep desire to be in a sorority, and that deeply misguided fascination resulted in the uprooting of what I most wanted. In a healthier, more God-breathed era of my walk, I sat daily with the Lord, focusing on His scripture and sometimes legitimately feeling my heart throb with joy at the incredible works of God. ​How had I not noticed before? Why did it take me so long to discover what goodness flows from His love?

What I'm trying to say is, what you say about you matters because it's where you focus all of your time and energy. If I told myself that all I was is a good writer, then my self esteem would fall to ashes at the first sign of critique. If I laid a foundation for myself based on my GPA, then I would be highly disappointed to find that whatever good grades I have can be taken in an instant by one misstep on my much-dreaded Hebrew midterm (yes, I really do take Hebrew). If I only found my worth in what other people say or think about me, then I will most definitely fall short of perfection because I mess up a lot and find myself saying "I'm sorry" to my friends and family a lot more than I'd care to.

So what I say about me is that I'm flawed, I'm imperfect, but I'm sure as heck loved by Someone who loves me more than the sum of my parts. He has never loved me on a face value. He doesn't love me because I got up and went for a run on Tuesday morning, He doesn't love me because I have an amazing job that pays me really well, He doesn't love me because I'm friends with people who post pictures of me on Instagram, He loves me because I simply exist. I'm here to do His good kingdom work. If I spent my time doing anything else but that, it would be in futility.

So, today, sit down and make a list of the earthly things you think define you. Then, counter them with a heavenly thing that God says about you. I'll start.

1. I am loved and important because I am friendly, likable, and bubbly.

• But God says I am loved because I am His--because He is faithful. Deuteronomy 7:9 says: "Know therefore that the LORD your God is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep his commandments, to a thousand generations."

2. I'm a college student.

• But God says that while this is a season of joy, this is a temporary season of life. I am not defined by my current stage of life, I am defined by how I reflect Christ in that season. Ecclesiastes 1:2 says: "Life is fleeting, like a passing mist. It is like trying to catch hold of a breath; All vanishes like a vapor; everything is a great vanity."

Those are just two examples of things that I feel define me. See how quickly and easily they are countered by the abounding promise of God's love? So focus not on what you say of you, focus on what God says of you. Because whatever you say of you is sure to fade in the shadow of God's purpose and plan for your life.